By Charles C. Opara
If you chose to ignore your partner because you are hurt and fail to communicate with him or her, you are engaging in silent treatment. Any relationship that gives silent treatment a chance is never going to be great.
It is a common occurrence with both man and woman, people will rather sit down facing the ceiling or the wall than facing their partner for possible communication and this kind of attitudes is so annoying, that if not handle well, not only the perpetrator will suffer for it but both of them except they start finding lasting solution to such attitude.
When one partner treats the other with silent treatment, the other partner at the receiving end feel hurt and if he or she is not strong enough to handle it, the feeling of isolation, intimidation and insignificant will overwhelm him/her and the resulting consequences is thinking of how to look elsewhere once the cold shouldering can no longer be taken.
If the relationship is still very young, the best bet is to handle the situation by nipping silent treatment behaviour in the bud before it becomes part of the relationship issue that makes one partner feeling unimportant in the relation.
The longer silent treatment stays in a relationship, the harder it is to overcome: Though it is not too late to address the issue but it will be much difficult to deal with relationship partner who often time refuses to communicate his or her feeling and chose to treat the significant other with silent treatment.
Silent treatment is just emotional abuse: It is often time not talk about as much as people talk about physical and verbal abuse. Emotional abuse is just too strong to be overlooked; it can be so devastating and cause so much damaging in one’s relationship.
Silent treatment is really an immature behaviour from any partner that engage in it, sometimes they think they are doing themselves good in other to avenge any wrong that might have been done to them by the other partner, but the reality is that, the resulting consequences is so much devastating and can boil up, cause much anger leading to verbal abuse and the collapse of any thriving relationship.
As simple as this sound, it is not always easy to tell a girl you love and getting the positive nod from her without being subjecting to rejection.
The truth is that no guy really want to be rejected after telling a girl that he’s falling in love with her, but only a very few actually get it as expected without much delay. So if you’re scare of rejection from the woman you love to date, be in relationship with and possibly marry her, what you’re about to read here now will definitely help you to get the positive response you most desire from here.
As scaring as it look like, it is actually getting the girl to love you and fall in love with you too is where you’ll need to do the hard work.
If you like a girl, don’t just ask her out immediately, 99% of guys who do such always get rejection from the girls because the best defence mechanism women have is to give “no” for an answer, that’s very sure. That put them on a safer side because much is not known about you and they can’t entrust their heart into a stranger’s hand.
Try to be her special friend to gradually enter into her heart:
Just being her friend alone cannot protect you from getting the awkward rejection but being her special friend will let you get closer to her heart and gradually, you can begin to enter into her heart as you begin to build rapport through the special friendship you both shared.
Being her special friend will require spending quality time with her, when she need a hand, your hand is always there to lift her up, have fun and exciting conversation with her.
But don’t get stuck into the friendship zone, which means you should avoid being her best friend instead of her lover with special friend ability.
Look out for reciprocal gesture from her:
At times, some girls get carried away with your friendship characteristic and enjoy every moment you share with them without even thinking of developing interest in you. If you’re just the only one calling, texting, doing all the visit, and she does not bother about it. Then you’ll need to think twice if she will be actually interested when you will tell her you’re falling in love with her.
One of the best ways to gauge her interest is to allow her to miss you or cut down the number of calls or texts you’re sending her for sometimes, like 2 to 4 days and observey if she didn’t bother to call you and find out what is really happening to you.
If she does call you, it then mean she is interested in you and has really missed you but if she doesn’t call you, she has no interest in you and you shouldn’t bother yourself to tell her about how you feel.
Flirt with her and talk late in the night:
Being a special friend will also require you to flirt with her to get even more closer to her heart. Also talk late in the night with her, and one great benefit you’re going to get when you engage her with conversation into the night, you have the opportunity of asking her personal questions, that period is the period when she feels relax on her bed and not thinking much about anything except probably you at that time.
You may ask question relating to relationship, her personal stories, her experience even in the hands of guys and what she loves in a guy that she admire most in every guy. That will even make things clear for you which will allow you to get closer to her heart.
Surely, these few tips above is all you need to get “yes” for an answer when you tell a girl you’re in love with her, it is very difficult for her to reject you if you do all of these, she can only ask for some time to think about it and you can be sure of positive response from her.
Relationship is full of ups and downs and sometimes, the associated challenges in it can cause you to lose your true self. Those that have never been in relationship or that have never experienced the other side of relationship sweetness should not forget that, every good looking relationship will sometimes go through difficulty, but the ability of the people involved in that relationship to understand individual differences and be able to work together to move ahead and weather the challenging period, knowing fully well that, there is light after every tunnels.
Having a fulfilling relationship will require you to be placed in a special place in your partner’s life and not losing your self-worth.
So being you and who you are is the genesis of leaving a fulfilling relationship. You’re special in your own kind of ways and if the ones that said he loves you cannot find that uniqueness in you, then the love he profess in actually not true love. It is better you let go of that relationship that has no recognition of your special uniqueness, instead of holding on to it and lost your identity.
No matter what you may be going through for now, it is important you don’t forget where you’re coming from, even if your past wasn’t good enough, your present and the future you has something to be cheered about, and don’t for any reason change your true identity for anyone. You are God’s own image which means you’re not worthless, you’re never a mistake because God does not make mistake.
It is important you hold your head up so as not to lose your self-worth. Don’t sell your dignity today because of the challenges you’re passing through now, tomorrow will be better and brighter, for if you lose that your self-worth to the lowest bidder today, it will be difficult to get it back tomorrow when things start getting brighter and the highest bidders are all gathering around you.
Don’t forget your true self. You are always who you are. You cannot be someone else and if someone needs you to change for him or her that means he or she doesn’t love you and you can’t have a fulfilling relationship with him or her.
Don’t give your consent to inferiority, by so doing; no one will be able to make you feel inferior inasmuch as you’re not consented to it. You must try as much as possible to keep doing your good deed, be who you are and do what you like and love yourself. It is only when you first love yourself, that you can be successful in loving someone else and both of you will be able to have a fulfilling relationship